Conversations With Strangers

Being a pedestrian has it's perks.  How often do you talk to strangers while going to doctor appointments, grocery shopping, or work?  Not at all if you drive yourself, right?  For a long time I would put headphones on and ignore the world as I traveled to my destinations.  I was always afraid to chat with people on the bus or at the corner while I waited for the light to change.  We were raised not to talk to strangers as if all other humans were some terrifying beast.   Yes, there are some scary people in the world and we may be at risk sometimes while out and about.  Don't worry, I don't go anywhere with these strangers.

 People want connection, even for a moment with a stranger.  People want to feel noticed, heard, and a little less lonely.  Most of my brief conversations are not pleasant, but the ones that last just long enough for me to get to my destination are the ones I know made a difference in someones life.  Even if all I did was smile and say Hello.

When speaking to the homeless, I always remind myself that they may not have full mental capabilities anymore.  I usually just listen to their stories, offer food, and let then be on their way.  It's heart breaking to hear about their families and old life.  Then there are ones who just want to talk about what a nice day it is. Their happiness is a pleasant sight which gives me hope.

There are the older ladies who are lonely. Kids don't visit anymore because everyone is too busy.  I see pictures of grand kids all the time.  If only their children could see the pride in these ladies eyes as they speak of family and all the accomplishments made in life.

Recently I have been chatting it up with random people everywhere I go.  Some are customers from my store.  I don't remember them, but they know me.  It's still weird when that happens.  My last conversation was about traffic and how every driver seems to be in such a hurry.  As we walked he told me that he enjoys riding his bike to work when the weather permits.  He also enjoys taking walks to Starbucks on his lunch breaks.  Then it turns into me listening to this man talking about his wife and how awesome she is.  I wonder if she knows how much he loves her and admires her hard work.

My favorite conversations are the ones I'm not participating in.  Just listening to strangers on the bus or at Starbucks chat about celebrities, world events, their families, and politics is entertaining and inspiring.  It is rare that I hear arguments.  What I hear and see in these conversations are strangers coming together to educate and understand opposing views, or just bragging about who has the more funny or successful kids/ grand kids.

I didn't realize how much of the world I was missing out on until I broke my headphones.

Words

Childish & Immature

Crazy

Emotional

Judgmental

Lazy

Loud

Obnoxious

Over Helpful

Over Sensitive (not the same as emotional)

Pack Rat

Passive- Aggressive

Sentimental

Smothering

Too Kind/Nice

Lent day Five: Ready for a Challenge

The day started with a hangover like feeling.  I think the very little sugar I had yesterday may be the cause, or maybe the caffeine from my tea.  I had an awful headache.  I got up to make the girls from Samantha's slumber party pancakes and bacon.  Chocolate chip pancakes were made for the first time. I'm not really a fan of them, but the girls liked them.  I chose a BLT instead.  We watched Nine Dead and I thought it was interesting.  It's like a mystery/psychological thriller type movie.  The girls all left before 2 pm. YAY! I thought they were staying past dinner, because Samantha invited them to stay that long.  Now that the kids are gone I can relax and clean up the house. Ha ha, yup cleaning house was relaxing for the moment.  I need to clear my head and think things through.  I have some things on my mind and in my heart that need to be worked out.  I'll go for a walk after dinner to help.

We made:
Hershey's cookies and cream cookies,
Brownies,
Blueberry cheese cake (also I bought one too),
Home made Oreo McFlurries,
Nachos for dinner
Nuka Cola (Fallout video game drink)
Chocolate chip pancakes with bacon for breakfast.









Tomorrow is the start of my 30 Day Challenges.  I will do Marc and Angels Challenge called 30 Challenges for 30 days of Growth.  I got it as a free download. Yay for free! According to the challenge I have to do these challenges for the full 30 days. A new challenge each day, but I must continue to do each challenge EVERYDAY! So as I add a challenge each day I will still be doing day ones challenge. This will be a challenge for sure and I'm excited.

Also, I will start a variety of fitness challenges that I am going to put together and make my own fitness challenge, sorta. We'll see how it goes.  If you would like to join me in my fitness challenge I will post a separate entry about how I will be challenging myself.

Question of the day: What does every good relationship have?

Communication- an honest, open, and trusting communication.  It's very important that people are not afraid to express their feelings with one another.  Be honest, open, trustworthy, understanding, and thoughtful in all communications in any relationship.

Lent Is Near

Tomorrow is Fat Tuesday!  Indulge in your sins...  I know I'm going for coffee with my friend Emma and talk about furthering our education.  I'm more excited to catch up with her and hopefully talk about fitness too.

Lent is coming, Lent is coming and guess what? I still have no idea what to give up besides soda.  I want to do the bad carbs and or refined sugars.  The problem is I just don't know enough to give 100%.  I have to give 100% or I won't feel that I completed Lent.  So, I think I will go with No junk food (mostly to remove refined sugars), Soda (again sugars), and processed foods (no pre-made/boxed/packaged crap). I think that would be a good start to better choices in the long run and removing sugars and carbs I do not need.  Also, it will give me time to learn more about good and bad carbs.  Yes?  Sounds good to me.  I will also be fasting on Wednesdays and Fridays- tea and water only.

I will restart an old workout challenge I want to do.  I'll post more about this in detail tomorrow.  I would also like to work on some writing and self awareness.  I will answer one question each day, something about myself, my opinions, beliefs and what not.  If you have a question you would like me to answer, feel free to message me or comment below.  During Lent I will  be working on a new 30 day project.  It will go with my question of the day.   It is called 30 Challenges for 30 days of Growth by marcandangel.com.  I found Marc and Angel on G+ and I enjoy their website.  So I thought I would give their challenge a try during Lent.  I will also use some of their questions for my Question of the Day.  I feel that this will be a great way for me to really get in touch with myself (haha touch myself, yeah okay, it's not funny).  Seriously, I think this will be good for me and I would like it if you would consider doing the same.

I think that's it for now.  I'm tired and waited till way to late to write.  I'll give you the low down on how blogging will be for Lent and where the challenges will fit in.

Good night

Lisa

Who am I?

Who, what, why, when, where, how...

Those pesky questions always lingering.
Who am I?
What kind of person am I?
Why am I this way, can I change it?
When did I become who I am today?
Where do I go from here?
How do I change what I don't like about myself?

Have you ever asked yourself these questions? They have been on my mind lately. I am having a hard time answering them. Maybe if I blog my thoughts on each question separately I can figure out the answers. Because writing all my thoughts about all questions in a notebook is not working.

A promise made.

I just started the 7 day book challenge. I was going to wait until July 1, but I was really bored today and thought "If i'm bored and not being productive, then I need to find a way to be". So I started reading. In the first chapter of The Woman's Book of Confidence it is said to embrace and get to know the stranger(s) within. We all have other selves. No one is exactly the same with everyone, not to mention our critical self. The book says to get to know that critical self, to learn why it's so scared or angry. To comfort that part of you and heal from within. we need to accept ourselves and give positive self talk.There is also a part in the chapter about growing a tail. Meaning owning up to our actions and being responsible. Like I said in previous posts I am a procrastinator and always felt i needed someone else to wind me up. I am also bad with the critical self, i have a horrible habit of bashing myself. I also have a hard time accepting compliments. These are things I need to work on.
~
On another note. I have been having a hard week. Which is why I really wanted to do the challenge. I need to read up on how to better myself and work on accepting myself. On Sunday July 1, 2012 I will be 35 years  old. that is not old, but I feel unaccomplished. The goals I set 10 years ago did not get fulfilled and I feel like a failure. I didn't work hard enough, I was careless with my finances, and I let my relationship fall apart and end. I am in the same spot I was ten years ago and I have nothing to show for it. Yes I am bashing a little, but at the same time I need to own up to the procrastination, the fear, and the irresponsibility. It is my own fault I am in this shitty position today.
There is one promise I made to myself at the same time I made these goals. I would only allow myself three more relationships (after the kids father), if none of them succeeded, then I would put myself into retirement. It has been 1 year and 11 months to the day since I was in a serious relationship and two months since I have been intimate with anyone (just so happens to be my ex). I have even quit masturbating. Now my question is, Is this the right thing to do at my age? Am I being silly about this? I just want to give up and walk away. I do need to work on myself, and I believe you cant be in a healthy relationship with someone else if you don't have a healthy relationship with yourself.  At least I have been using this belief more as an excuse than anything. After the kids father I had two 6 month relationships and then 6 years with Ryan, until he ended it August 29, 2010. I had a brief unwanted relationship with someone and then a few random dates. Nothing worth talking about.  I don't know. I think it's time to let go.

We can't use our past as an excuse to stay in bondage to a negative, defeated approach to life. - joyce meyer ministries  {whoa, I just saw this on facebook while I was responding to a message. perfect timing}

The 7 Day Book Challenge

In my last post I wrote about a blog I love to follow by the name of  In over your head. Last night as I was looking through the blogs I follow Julien had a new post titled How to read 7 books in 7 days. I thought FABULOUS! I've been looking for a challenge. Plus I have been putting off reading certain books I keep saying I will read. So, I will put my procrastination aside and get busy on this challenge. In the blog Julien states "If you can, choose books that stack on top of each other so that you learn successive, stacking topics." So I chose a theme for myself - Self Awareness. I have been wanting to read these books and have skimmed through most. Two of the books I read a few years ago when I needed them for a class at LMC. Each book has something I feel I want to learn to help better myself and my awareness to myself and others. 

The books: 

.1 The Woman's Book Confidence by: Sue Patton Thoele

.2 Breakthrough Dreaming by: Dr. Gayle Delaney

.3 Quest by: Denise Linn

.4 The Intuitive Way by: Penney Peirce  I have the hard cover 1997 Ed.

.5 Your Handwriting Can Change Your Life by: Vimala Rodgers This is the PDF version. so you can read it too :)

The next two books are by a great  Marriage Counselor & Psychology Professor at Los Medanos College and JFK University.

.6 More Than Just Sex by: Daniel Beaver

.7 Creating Intimate Connection Emotional Intimacy by: Daniel Beaver

He also has a blog and youtube channel

danbeaver - youtube

danielbeaver.com/blog

Now lets get this challenge going